Not slaves but friends

Sixth Sunday in Easter

Acts 10:25-48; 1 Jn 4:7-10; Jn 15:9-17

On the 23rd of March this year, in a supermarket the little town of Trèbes in France, a very tragic event was overcome by a bright lay of light. As a siege against terrorists was unfolding, a French policeman, Arnaud Beltrame took the place of one of the hostages. The hostage, Julie V. was an employee at the supermarket, 40 years of age, and had a daughter of two and a half years. The press reported that she said of the policeman, "He has given his life for me. He was killed that I may live."

Many people shared this tragic story on the social media with the very words that we find in today’s Gospel: "There is no greater love than for one to give his life for his friend."

But why does Jesus put so much emphasis on friendship in today's Gospel? Friendship is mentioned no less than three times, and in doing so, he redefines friendship, giving it a more authentic meaning.

We must recall that until Jesus's time, friendship was only possible among equals. The  rich man can only be friends with the rich man, the slave with the slave. Friendship with God was unheard of. It was impossible and downright scandalous. At least in the Greek-Pagan world, human beings were created to serve the gods, and to offer sacrifices to appease the all powerful god who always seemed to be angry at human beings.

But Jesus turns this definition on its head because in his self emptying on the cross, he elevates us to the dignity of calling us friends, friends with God. No wonder he makes that emphasis – no longer slaves – but friends.

What do friends do? They love one another. Unfortunately, however, it seems to me that we have inherited the Greek-Pagan way of relating with God. Sometimes I feel that we still deal with God as though we were slaves instead of enjoying the status of friendship that he has given us. This happens for example when we do things not out of love but our of obligation, making the bare minimum: when we obey the commandments simply to avoid being judged by God rather than out of our desire to do good; when we pray to silence our conscience and not because we really crave to be in the presence of God our friend.

And as though that were not enough, Jesus continues to shock us with his words. He says, you are my friends if you do what I have commanded you. That sounds strange because friends do not command each other around. Only masters command their slaves. But Jesus’s command is of a different type, it is The Commandment of Love. And when we do so, wo would no longer be slaves, Jesus said, but friends.

This is so true. You cannot force someone to love. We cannot obey Jesus’s command to love others. It has to come from the heart, and in doing so, we become true friends of God. A couple of years back I met an old family friend whose sister had just passed away. I tried to express my condolences to her. With a tear in her eye, she told me, “She was not just a sister to me. She was more than that: she was a friend.”

Here is where the decision comes in. They say that we are born in a family but we choose our friends. In friendship, we accept the person as he or she is and we offer ourselves as we are. For it to be an authentic friendship, we cannot put on masks or false selves but we have to be who were are.

In the second reading, John says, “Everyone who loves in begotten by God.” Perhaps we might think that this is a misprint or a figure of speech but it is not. What makes us resemble God is not simply anything that we received, because we were always brought up that way or anything like that. Rather what makes us really begotten by God is our readiness to love, especially when it is hardest to do so.

My prayer therefore is that we might all have a "Cornelius moment". Cornelius was the pagan soldier who was baptized although he was not a Jew. Sometimes, like Cornelius we might not feel much part of the People of God, we might feel distant or ashamed of some things in our past. However that must not keep us away from God and there is always the possibility of returning to God and of accepting this invitation of friendship that Jesus is offering us, because he gave his life for us so that his joy may be in us and so that our joy may be complete.